st helens news

Radical plans by the government to send children as young as four down the mines have been uncovered by our reporter. The one page...
stuttgart st helens twin towns

Rumours are circulating that each of the towns citizens will soon be able to claim a free Porsche sports car. The famous car manufacturer is...
Why do we have eggs at Easter

In an attempt to get an answer to this ever popular question we invited several members of the cloth to a small meeting and...
Oscars Boycott 2016

Portly people from around the world are standing united by boycotting the forthcoming 2016 Oscar Awards. A spokesperson for the Slightly Obese foundation told SHCN...
St Helens Gritters

St Helens MBC have confirmed that at least two road gritter trucks have been deployed several times over the past few days. A spokesperson for...
Mark Zuckerberg hoax

Facebook founder and multi billionaire Mark Zuckerberg has recently been at the centre of a huge hoax that resulted in thousands of stupid people...
st helens fire stations

Plans have been approved to close the towns two fire stations, Millfields in Eccleston and Parr Stocks Road. They will be replaced with a...
vintage clothing St Helens

A new retro clothing store called Gullible is due to open in the town centre this week. The store that will sell second hand clothes...
Adele miserable

Multiple Grammy and Brit Award winner Adele has been urged by relationship specialists RELATE to suck it up and move on. Miserable Bitch A spokesperson for...
UK defence changes 2025

Prime Minister, David Cameron has pledged to have the UK ready to deal with terror attacks by 2025. The leader, famous for his penchant for...