Home Headlines Adele Urged To Lighten The Fuck Up!

Adele Urged To Lighten The Fuck Up!

Multiple Grammy and Brit Award winner Adele has been urged by relationship specialists RELATE to suck it up and move on.

Miserable Bitch

A spokesperson for the organisation told us “Adele is a gifted artist however we’ve grown increasingly concerned that she’s obsessed with an ex. Her lyrics suggest that she’s hounding this person, turning up unannounced at events years down the line and wanting to rake up the past. It’s quite obvious that this guy is just viewing this as harassment”.

He continued “We want to stress to Adele that this is unhealthy behaviour, the guy is obviously nuts deep in someone else now and probably dreads her rocking up half cut with her mascara running, she really should get the message and move on. It’d be great to see her paint a smile on her face and sing about something happy for a change. She could do a remix of Agadoo maybe?”

Fuck My Life

We spoke to leading psychologist Dr Barbara Blacksheep who told us “Adele shows all the classic signs of a bunny boiler, She’s become so obsessed with a past failed relationship that she’s in a perpetual state of denial, her fans consist of like minded people who hang on her every miserable word. She really needs to put her big girl knickers on and give it up.”

We contacted the management of Adele but nobody was available for comment as they were busy planning her forthcoming ‘Fuck My Life’ tour.

Image Credit: CHRISTOPHER MACSURAK via Wikimedia Commons