Papa Johns St Helens

Phantom Of The Cinema To Decide On Buzby’s Future

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The legendary Phantom Of The Cinema in St Helens is to have the final say on whether Papa Johns is to be granted planning...
game of thrones baby names

Game Of Thrones Blamed For Surge in Ridiculous Baby Names

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The registry office have today issued a plea asking new parents to reconsider naming their newborns after characters from Game Of Thrones. A spokesman...
nigel farage breastfeeding

Business Leaders Tell Nigel Farage “Nobody Puts Baby In The Corner”

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Business leaders from around the UK yesterday sent an internal memo to their staff instructing them to sit Nigel Farage out of sight should...
saints wigan

Possible Truce With Saints And Wigan

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Rumours are rife this morning that the people of St Helens and Wigan are considering joining forces in 2015. For years now the two...
ugly estate agents

The Property Market Needs Beautiful People

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As the UK Economy gets back on it's feet, experts are worried that the property market may crash again unless the beautiful people return. A...
Haydock Amateur Dramtics

North Korea To Make Movie About Sony

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Reliable sources indicate that North Korea are funding a new movie called 'The Playstation'. We believe that the initial plot was based around Sony...
Tesco Owners

Tesco Has No Idea Who Owns It

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Retail giant Tesco has grown so big and has done so much creative accounting that it's now no idea who owns it. City analysts...
black friday fighting

Government Orders Black Friday To Be Scrapped

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After watching several youtube videos of Black Friday violence the UK Government has declared that there are to be no more Black Friday events...
Rainford in Lancashire

Rainford To Leave St Helens

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News has broken today that Rainford has been in secret talks to become part of Lancashire again. A spokesperson for Rainford parish told our...