St Helens Council to revamp old T.V game show 3-2-1

St Helens Council to revamp old T.V game show 3-2-1


St Helens council have submitted audacious plans to bring back classic TV favourite 3-2-1.
The original format featured Ted Rogers (host) and sidekick (dusty bin). Contestants would try to solve cryptic clues for big prizes, though if they failed they would take home a brand new dust bin!

Colin Clueless (St Helens entertainment official) said “we are planning live shows this summer broadcasting from St Helens show”! “But here’s the clever twist” he added, “a wheelie bin will be the star prize, and you won’t have to pay the administration fee of £17.50”

Other prizes will include, Having your wheelie bin cleaned for a full year. lunch at the charcoal grill with Bill Oddie, a gold plated kerbside caddie and a house brick to weigh down your blow away bags.

Clueless (53) told our reporter, “we’re on the look out for a presenter of the show…we have approached Johnny Vegas, though he said “it’s a shit idea, so fuck off”.
The idea of the show is to promote the extremely unpopular recycle scheme. John E Bag, council official said “This is exactly what we need to put the fun back into recycling and make the scheme popular”…He added, “i will offer this cryptic clue for you all to solve”.

I come once a fortnight but the time is unstated
i leave your street full of cardboard and make you infuriated
I’m purple and yellow and i look like a tit
and I’m flogging a dead horse, coz the schemes fucking shit!

Locals have been trying to solve the highly cryptic riddle. Mike Hard (from Clinkham Wood) answered “is it Purple Aki”? Up to now no one has guessed the right answer.

Story by Arthur Woodworm