Tesco Has No Idea Who Owns It

Tesco Has No Idea Who Owns It

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Tesco Owners

Retail giant Tesco has grown so big and has done so much creative accounting that it’s now no idea who owns it. City analysts have been working with the finance department at Tesco head office this week in an attempt to unravel the many transactions, restructures, instruments, offshore trusts, indemnities, options and write downs that have happened over the years.

Tesco started wayback in 1919 and from humble high st beginnings it has since grown to be one of the largest retailers in the world, Tesco has relentlessly pursued world domination but since the latest profit reporting error the retailers ambitious expansion plans have been put on hold. It’s had to shelve it’s plans to build a Death Star (24hour) and has even halted it’s take-over of Haydock.

One school of thought is that Tesco is now so big and cumbersome that it’s now just an artificial intelligence that runs itself. Nobody owns it, it just exists.

Until the owner of Tesco is established we can at least look forward to a break in new rugby stadiums being built as a planning permission deal clincher.