Bulletin Board Classics

Despite all the crap being talked on the bulletin board, we occasionally get some classic quotes. Thanks to everyone involved. Here are a few…

On St Helens words and phrases…

"Alreet luv,fanci goin't daan chippe ferus an gerin mi a split? Or dusthe wanne gotuth Livsays an gemi a duzen pawkpies?" (Mutley)

"Worart onobehtattall its brew tarm, lerrus gerris answashed and get snap tins and geritetten" (Geoff Lovett)

"one o me favourite t'ellins words has to be clempt (possibly klempt) meaning starvin'... as in "savers on yer pastie, ah'm clempt"" (Nige)

"Where you born at Pilks? - meaning your blocking my view so get out of my way - Doing a wigan walk - meaning leaving early." (The Chair Maker)

"Gooin arrt wiff ar mawd" (Earlestown Eddie)

"Snooing wi twat'' - meaning "the Plaza was full of nice girls last night" (Geoff Lovett)

"Scon'yed = Scone Head (fool)" (Ellibob)

"Goin' on sniff" - Making ones focussed vocation to find a soul mate." (MacMarket)

Still in use today "me" at the end of a sentence. e.g. - "ah proper fanceh an uxley's puddin me". Or "Aahm sick o' bein shagged rownd t'back o' Cindy's me. E sed e luvved meh." (Fatty Vautin)

"Burgie water", the black liquid that came off them when it rained. That's been a bit of a saying of mine for yars for a bad pint..."looks like fuckin' burgie
water" (St Div)

On childhood games…

"Something has sprung to mind. We used to play "Grand National" which was basically racing over everybody's hedges up the street, could be quite painful if you banged a knee on a hidden concrete post as well." (St Div)

"Oo oo, what about kissy cats. or Kissy Kats if you were cool! Oh, those were the days when you could run after girls without the police being brought into it or by being bottled at Crystals by their other half!" (Electroself)

"Draw a snake upon your back, chop its head off, chop its tail off, which finger....did....I.... dabitwith. TEN TWENNY FIRTY AAAAHHHHH - Interestingly enough, a latin scholar I know mentioned that tick was an old Roman game, and 'barley' is a spoonerism of 'parley', meaning truce. He might have made it up though, th'cunt" (Slutchypig)

"God yeah, snake on the back, forgot about that one ! Don't think I mentioned 'scrag and bash' originally either, can't remember if there were any rules, think it was just an excuse to knock shit out of someone !" (St Div)

"Anyone ever play Pie Crust? Two teams of 6 or eight, first team went "in" and formed a "pie crust"....the first guy bent over and hung onto a wall or fence then the rest of his team bent over one by one and hung onto the pants of the guy in front to form a line.The job of the next team was to run like hell and jump onto the crust to try and break it! Usually the weakest team member was put right next to the fence 'cos it was harder to jump far enough to collapse him." (Coljanford)

Check out the bulletin board for a more extensive collection of completely incomprehensible shite!